Reesa Tessa, Love is Blind Season 6, & other red flags

Slow down and pay attention, or else.

May 21, 2024

Reesa Teesa’s viral 50-part TikTok saga “Who TF Did I Marry?” was a whole revelation this past February.

If you haven’t seen it, grab some popcorn and set aside 7 hours to watch each video in order. For more details on her stranger-than-fiction story, where she uncovers the truth about her now ex-husband (whom she refers to as “Legion” in the series), read more here.

Tareasa Johnson is an incredibly intentional storyteller. From the first video, she knew exactly how the story would unfold, hooking viewers with her relatable and accountable narrative. This deserves recognition, not to mention the vulnerability required to share some of her most embarrassing moments.

To summarize, her ex-husband lied to her about nearly everything in their relationship… but she was also lying to herself. Despite uncovering clear red flags—such as a failed home purchase because he refused to provide proof of funds to the realtor and the unfulfilled promise of a new car—she still married him.

Here’s what I’ve learned from Reesa Teesa’s story:

Who TF Did I Marry?: Lessons Learned

“When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”
- Maya Angelou

Pay attention to the person before you (language, mannerisms, character). Do their actions match their words? Does anything seem off or inconsistent? If you take a closer look at past interactions, there were likely signs alerting you to how this person thinks or behaves. Believe what you see, not what you hear.

We are all Reesa Teesa.

What made Reesa Teesa’s story so compelling was that it was painfully relatable. I think we’ve all experienced moments in our lives where we’ve willed something to be true because we wanted it to be true. She wanted to be loved, to be married, and she felt that “her time had come” even when the math wasn’t mathing.
Sometimes your body knows things before your mind can articulate it. Develop and trust your intuition and be honest with yourself.

Shame is dangerous.

Reesa Teesa didn’t confide in her friends or family, even as her situation became more and more serious, because she was ashamed.
Shame can prevent you from seeking help and in some cases, lead you even further down a path of misalignment with your values, your truth, and your heart. This is extremely dangerous.
Be careful who you allow into your life because it can take years to remove them or recover from their presence. Reesa Teesa almost had a child with her ex-husband, which would have bound them together for life. IMAGINE.

Love is Blind - Season 6

This show is a train wreck and I’m obsessed. If you haven’t been following, Love is Blind is Netflix’s hit reality show where singles date without ever seeing each other before getting engaged to be married, live together in the real world and head all the way to the altar before deciding whether or not they’ll say “I do” or “I don’t” in front of their friends and family — all in the span of a few weeks. It’s wild.

At first, the concept was novel. The cast members were there to try an unconventional approach to finding love, but now that the show has become popular the casting department has lowered their standards, favoring sensationalism. Season 6 was disappointing in the most tragically entertaining way possible.

Here is what I’ve learned from each couple:

Amy & Johnny: Their only conflict was that Johnny had no idea how birth control works. Both men and women could benefit from a better understanding of the female body. 😅

Jeremy & Laura: Sometimes two people are not compatible even if there is an attraction. Don’t force things that aren’t meant to be and know when to cut your losses.

Kenneth & Brittany: Kenneth was a master gaslighter and Brittany seemed to be more in love with the idea of Kenneth than the man himself. It’s the details, the moments, and the little things that make up a life with someone. Choose wisely!

Chelsea & Jimmy: Chelsea was living in her own reality and Jimmy had a hard time standing up for himself. Improving self-awareness and self-esteem can help reduce the need for validation.

AD & Clay: Don't save her, she don't wanna be saved - J. Cole
AD was not truly listening or paying attention to anything Clay said or did and Clay was not ready for marriage from the day he stepped foot on the set. Be careful of falling in love with potential.

Love is Blind is a case study on human psychology and I’ll be tuning in next season, hoping that the show will return to its roots but prepared for more drama. My favorite LIB reviews are from content creators Jessie Woo (Internet personality and comedian) and Steph Anya (a licensed marriage and family therapist).

What does Who TF Did I Marry? and Love is Blind say about dating and relationships in 2024?

ChatGPT, defines discernment: Discernment refers to the ability to perceive, recognize, and understand the finer details or distinctions between things. It involves keen insight, good judgment, and the ability to make sound decisions based on careful observation and evaluation. Discernment often entails the capacity to differentiate between truth and falsehood, right and wrong, or between subtle nuances within complex situations. It requires sensitivity to context, an understanding of underlying motives or intentions, and the ability to weigh various factors to arrive at an informed conclusion. Discernment is valuable in navigating ethical dilemmas, assessing the credibility of information, and making choices aligned with one's values and goals.

The conclusion:

Learn discernment.
Don’t rush. You will find your way to what is meant for you if you listen and pay attention to your innermost voice.
We could all use some therapy.
There is a lot to unpack from what we’ve been taught about gender roles and expectations.

Other red flags 🚩

What does Who TF Did I Marry? and Love is Blind Season 6 mean for the loneliness economy?

What we secretly love about dating shows is watching other people struggle and fail. It’s either a cathartic sense of relief or an escape from our own experiences. We can judge from a safe distance with little to no stakes.

We will keep seeing content and products that exploit our insecurities, fears, and stereotypes about different groups. This can either divide or bring people together, but ultimately drive consumer habits. Keep an eye out for these red flags as you consume media content and/or watch with a more critical eye:

🚩 Content that lacks diversity in perspectives, voices, or representation (beware of confirmation bias)

🚩 Content that prioritizes sensationalism over accuracy and nuance (caution: manipulative editing)

🚩 Content that spreads false or misleading information (no credible sources or evidence)

Some green flags 🟩

How to date responsibly in 2024?

🟩 Keep an open yet critical mind

🟩 Stay hopeful

🟩 Trust yourself

🟩 Develop intuition

🟩 Heal your trauma because it’ll follow you

🟩 Actively listen to people’s stories & share your own story

One More Thing

I repeat, we could all use therapy. Heidi Preibe creates insightful personal development and Attachment Theory videos on YouTube, for your discovery and growth. ✨

The Loneliness Economy newsletter 🌻

Thanks for reading! It’s a fun practice for me to write to gather my thoughts on these topics. Share with a friend if you’ve found my words interesting or helpful. Comment below if you have anything to add.